You're invited.

Several months ago I had a strange dream and it has taken me this long to hash out what God was trying to show me through it.

I was attending a pre-wedding party. There were a lot of people I did not know. We sat at a large table discussing the wedding. Apparently the wedding party wanted all the women in attendance to wear their wedding gowns to the wedding. I remember thinking that was really strange, but I was excited to participate. We left to drive over to the hotel where we were getting ready.

Along the way Mike was driving a large SUV. We drove past a party area. People were everywhere. Drinking and partying on patios and in the streets. I looked up and saw a woman in a skimpy dress on a balcony without a railing. She took out her lipstick, put it on, and then jumped to her death on the street below. She landed right by the passenger side of the car. I remember a sense of helplessness and sadness. A few people wondered over to look. They shook their heads in sadness, but nobody did anything. Nobody knew what to do. I didn't know what to do. We continued to the hotel.

Once we arrived I saw another guest in her dress. She looked so uncomfortable in it, like she didn't belong in it. I instantly became self conscious myself. I became certain I could not wear the dress to another person's wedding. Surely the bride didn't really want that. I didn't have anything else to wear! I frantically looked through a suit case and pulled out pants that looked like something my daughter would wear. I added a top that didn't match. I knew I looked silly and begged Mike to take me shopping. He insisted there was no time. We had to get to the wedding.

We arrived and I went to enter the ceremony. A man in a suit stopped me and began to ridicule me for what I was wearing. He told me I could not expect to ever enter the wedding looking like I did. He laughed at me and mocked me. I burst into tears and ran to Mike. Then I woke up.

I believe my dream was not only reflective of the condition of my heart at the time, but the condition of the church's heart. The church is the bride of Christ. We've lost our identity and authority. While participating in great things sounds exciting we lose our confidence in the midst of watching the world crumble. People around us are hurting and we aren't real sure what to do about it because we don't understand we have the answer for them. We don't understand we were meant to intervene on their behalf. We feel helpless and ill equipped to handle the problems.

We tell ourselves we have more preparation to do. We aren't ready yet. We fall for the lie we don't belong where God has called us. Then we settle for less than we were meant to have. We settle for less than we were meant to do. We compromise and convince ourselves God didn't mean you specifically when he said we would do things greater than him. He didn't mean to invite us to this. I'm just a guest watching everything he is about to do. I'm a spectator.

So we arrive at ministry moments, feel ill prepared and self conscious to find the enemy waiting to remind us of all the reasons we don't belong. He tells us we can't enter into what God has for us. And we believe him.

I settled for less than what I've been called to. The Church has settled for less than what they've been called to. We think we need more head knowledge, more experience, more talent, more money, more preparation to participate. Meanwhile the world is hurting and desperately needing for us to know who we are and what we are capable of through Jesus.

If you know Jesus, you're equipped. He's all the experience we need. You're only part to play is allowing him to do what he does best. I'm gonna get out of the way by stepping in the mess. You're invited too.

The Desires of your Heart

What comes to mind when I ask you what are the desires of your heart? I've been asking myself this lately, or rather God is asking me this. I was sad to discover I have no idea. Somewhere along the path of doing life, I have lost track of my desires. Maybe I dismissed them thinking it was selfish to want more, or maybe even wrong to dream because maybe it was outside of God's will for my life.

I realized many of us shelve the dreams and ideas in exchange for what the world desires for us. We don't even realize we are doing it. At a young age we are encouraged to follow a certain course to a specific definition of success. Responsibility replaces the idea that we should follow God wholeheartedly, even if defies worldly wisdom.

So we begin to plan and map out our lives to live safely with little chance of hardship and risk. We encourage solid career paths and wise saving plans. Don't get me wrong, these aren't bad things. The problem comes when we think we should be content with these things when we were designed with more in mind. We end up where the world says we should be and find we aren't fulfilled.

Sadly even in the Church, where we should be encouraged into our destinies, we often find limits. We think callings require seminary degrees. We think what we have to offer stops at our tithe checks. Sometimes, it is seen as humble to assume you aren't cut out for anything amazing. This false humility strips us of our identity and our destiny.

God made us with a specific purpose in mind. He planned ahead the things he wanted us to do. He placed desires in us that would propel us into this plan. Our dreams and desires are no mistake. He didn't give us dreams to tease us or to teach us how to be content with something less.

Somehow we have fallen for the idea that the cross was to bring forgiveness of sins and that is all. The rest is waiting for eternity to come. Eternal is...eternal....as in it already started and won't cease. We're in it when we're in him. The cross was not only for forgiveness, it was to have life to the full. (John 10:10 )

To be fully alive, we have to know who we are. What our identity is in him. That means having the confidence to pursue, unashamedly, what he has for us. It means claiming the desires he has given us and understanding he gave them to us knowing us and loving us. Much of the Church is bored, because they still think they are just sinners saved by grace waiting for his return. But he is waiting for us to understand we are sons and daughters of a King who have a key role to play in the war that is taking place until he comes. If we knew how vital our role was, would be willing to give it up? Would we settle for an average life of getting by when we were made to do greater things than Jesus did. (John 14:12 )

I believe God is waking up his Church. He is reminding his bride who she is and how wonderful and great her calling is. It starts by finding out who he says we are. It starts by looking at the desires of our hearts under the lens of who God says we are instead of under the limited lens of who the world says we should be. Don't settle for average when you've been made extraordinary. Don't shy away from risk and adventure in favor of comfort and familiarity. Don't apologize for wanting more out of life. You were meant for more.

"But you are not like that, for you are a chosen people. You are royal priests, a holy nation, God's very own possession. As a result, you can show others the goodness of God, for he called you out of the darkness into his wonderful light." 1st Peter 2:9

I'm not getting my way

If I had my way, I would be there now. Right this minute, I would be in a a small cabin in the mountains planning my relaxing week of hiking, dining out, enjoying the company of friends, sitting in Starbucks for as long as I wanted, sipping coffee, eating a cake pop...or 3 and writing. I would be relaxing after a really long up hill fight. I would be praising God for his faithfulness in bringing me this far. Financially stable, confident of the task he has given me and able to tell others "Don't give up!"

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.
Isaiah 55:8-9

But I don't have my way. God has me right where he wants me. I certainly don't understand his ways. I don't understand what he is doing. But I know he is doing something. I want stability and he is giving me uncertainty. I want confidence and he lets my circumstances shake everything I thought I knew about his plan and about my calling.

I've already learned trying to figure it out doesn't help. Begging God for insight is like asking for a life map to brace yourself for every turn you don't like. If I had it, I would probably try to suggest shortcuts, or worst, ask for something other than what he wants to give me because that road looks to treacherous. So I don't ask why. Sometimes I don't even ask what. I just repeat and hold on to what I do know.

"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

"I will betroth you to me forever; I will betroth you in righteousness and justice, in love and compassion. I will betroth you in faithfulness, and you will acknowledge the LORD" Hosea 2:19-20

"The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. he will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing."
Zephaniah 3:17

His ways are not my ways. Praise God for that. If I had my way, I would not be in his. I would never take the hard road, I would never mature, I would never grow in faith or conviction. I would never be able to tell others "Don't give up!". I would never discover what he wants for me. So for now I will settle for I what I do know. Even if I don't like where I am and don't have any idea what he is doing, he is with me. He is mine and I am his.

Where are we?

"For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." Ephesians 6:12

Imagine with me for a moment that someone walks in your front door, through your living room and picks up your television and walks out. Then they return and grab your computer and leave again. Meanwhile you sit on your couch watching them. You don't protest. You don't try to stop them. You just sit there and watch. Once they are gone you say to yourself, "This sucks. My stuff is gone."

I doubt if someone came in your house univited and tried to take your stuff, you would sit by idly and accept it. So why then, do we pretend as Christians, that the enemy is not trying to take from us? Why do we wonder where our joy and peace went? Why do we wonder where the fruit of spirit went? Or worst, why do we accept it as gone?

"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." John 10:10

If we're not having life to the full then something has been stolen from us. If you don't have peace and joy, there has been a theif in your midst. Maybe you didn't recognize him. Maybe you thought it was just circumstances or emotions. Maybe you were duped into handing it over freely, believing it was natural consequences to a mistake. Maybe you forgot who you are.

If Christ came to give us abundant life then it has been given. Sometimes we assume he just meant heaven. We sit by idly accepting assualt because we think it is part of this world. Don't get me wrong. Jesus said we will have trouble in this world. Things will happen that threaten to steal our joy and peace, but he has overcome the world. He said he has given us life abundantly. He said we have his spirit. We are his. We have a restored relationship. So if he is what satisfies and we have him already, how can it be that abundant life waits for us in heaven and not now?

Why are we warned of the enemy and given the armor of God if we are not intended to use it? We are in a battle. How many fights have you seen where one side takes all the hits and the other side just limps on and does not defend or strike back? We're meant to fight back. We've been armed. We've been instructed. Don't just stand there. Don't delay. Don't say to yourself "This might be an attack, but I'm in the middle of something, so I'll pray later." That is not how battles are won.

We are more than conquerors. (Romans 8:37) We need to recognize our role here. We are meant to intervene. We've been equipped to stop the enemy, not just for ourselves, but for others. We aren't here to live our lives until we get our entry ticket into heaven stamped.

If you are bored, confused, complacent, worried, or fearful, then you have forgotten who you are and what is already yours. It is time to take it back.

Becoming Fully Satisfied Now

If you could have anything right now, the one thing you've been waiting for, what would it be?

For the Israelites it was the promised land. They wanted their promise without the journey. They were so focused on the promise, they lost focus of their purpose. Promises are great. Promises provide hope for a future and guidance towards your destiny. But promises are never meant to replace our satisfaction with God. The same God was with them in the wilderness that would be with them in the promised land.

I can pretty much tell when the promise is taking the place of God. I find myself discontent, impatient and confused. Instead of giving thanks and praying boldly, I succumb to complaining and praying as if I have no hope and no direction.

The journey is an important part of the promise. The journey allows time for growth in character and faith. It prepares you for what God's plan is. It creates a humble attitude and allows you to see exactly how incapable you are and how capable he is.

Our purpose is to delight in God, on the journey and in the promise. It is our choice how we walk the journey. We can complain, doubt and even turn back and let the promise die. Or we can let peace reign in our hearts, realize we already have all that satisfies with us where we are and allow God to prepare us for what he has in store. Its admitting God knows us better than we know ourselves.

Let the journey push you closer to God and share the joy with him when you reach what you have been hoping for.

"The LORD your God, who is going before you, will fight for you, as he did for you in Egypt, before your very eyes, and in the wilderness. There you saw how the LORD your God carried you, as a father carries his son, all the way you went until you reached this place.” Deuteronomy 1:30-31

Lift Up Your Eyes

"The LORD said to Abram after Lot had parted from him, "Lift up your eyes from where you are and look north and south, east and west."

We often base our decisions and measure our success by what we see. Whether it be our job, family, church or finances. We make an assessment of our life and live within it.

I love how God tells Abram, "Lift up your eyes from where you are..." He invites Abram to see beyond his current situation. There is more that God is doing. Abram's sight has a limit. Our sight has limits. Sometimes, all I see are my current cirsumstances, what is working and what isn't working. I see where I am falling short. My prayers become boxed into what I know, what I can see.

But God sees more. God is saying, don't get wrapped up in what is going on now and what you are doing. Look and see what I am doing. I'm not limited to where you are now. Lift your eyes up. There is so much more!

Seeing with God allows us to release our faith and pray based on his promises instead of our limitations. It reminds us he is leading the way and his view restores hope.

Not Settling for Anything Less

Trying to cultivate a relationship without communication is difficult. I remember on my wedding day, the message was about the importance of communication in a marriage. Our pastor urged us to focus on communication as the cornerstone of our marriage to keep us strong and connected. So why would my relationship with God be in any different?

I would try to read scripture and it mostly felt like a chore. I would pray and it mostly felt like I was talking to a wall. Surely Jesus didn't die so I could talk to walls and drag around a large book that talks about a relationship that is waiting for me only after I get to heaven. Somewhere along the way I fell for a lie, that led to an agreement, that led to discouragement, that led to hopelessness.

I knew God was talking to other people. That only made the problem worst. If he is talking to them and not me then the problem is me. I don't pray enough. I don't seek him enough. I don't read his Word enough. I have some hidden sin that is keeping him from getting closer. The list could be endless. When I say it out loud I see how ridiculous it is. But it was rolling around in my head for years. For some reason if you never say it out loud you never get to hear how fully it contradicts his Word.

I wasn't recognizing who I was because of his grace. Deep down I believed I wouldn't be who I needed to be until I was in heaven. His grace was my entry ticket. Sadly, a lot of the Church thinks this way. A lot of the Church is still wondering around just as confused as the rest of the world, as if they don't have access to the throne room of a King who has it all the answers. It has rendered us discontent and powerless.

We were made to enjoy him. We were made to hear him. I'm already his. I can already hear him. I'm not settling for anything less than what I was made for and what he died to give me; a relationship with him.